Rest In Peace

You are not dead...but yet in every moment I am praying for your soul,
I pray for you that prison is not getting old,
For you have barely done even half of your conviction,
When people ask where my father is I can not even begin to say the sentence,
A cold hard truth,
A burden that is heavy to carry,
For what you have done fuels so much hatred I could fly through the roof,
For you are to blame for the struggles of many,
If you did not want to love my mother...why marry?
You are a lair and a phonie,
You say you care...so why didn't you take the time to get to know me?
You say that you would be there til the end if you were able,
You need help...just try to remain stable,
I dont want you to feel badly because I have moved on,
When you get out of prison you will realize that Rachel is gone,
Lost her self in the depth of sorrow,
A day in my shoes..
A pain you need to borrow...
My dreams still hide in fear of you,
I look at myself and you come to mind,
I will pass the 10th grade...the first of my kind!
How pathedic,
A wasted life you are.

Answer Me!

I am not talking for my health,
Listen to what I have to say and shut your mouth,
What I have to say is important and vital,
I should be listened to...regardless of me being a child,
I try to stay motivated,
But I am so tired of being downgraded

The un lucky one

Momma tells me to get some rest,
And that patience is one of loves tests,
But I can't help wonder about you and where you are,
A hard life...your success I beg upon a shooting star,
Waiting for my phone to ring,
But it's not you. Nothing less than disappointing,
It's wrong... But who said?
I am anxious to read what you have written me,
I feel like a lunatic... Is it that crazy?
I seem to get what nobody else can comprehend,
But you are so intriguing...where to start? Better yet.. Where to end?
All I know is I like him.
It takes little effort for me to notice whom they are...but why do they always have to be so bad? I am prepared...waiting to run to dad,
But if you hold good judgment,
You have nobody to blame if you foolishly forget-
Who you are and all  that makes you stand tall.

Miss it

I have quick and clever mind,
I walk a straight but no specific line,
I speak my mind,
When I am confused I just give it time,
I am confident in the decisions that I make,
When I want immediate answer I will just wait,
The wind will blow as the hills flowers grow,
And the roof tops of houses will be covered in fluffy now...
But when the time comes-let me go.

15 years no bail

I said I would never return,
I open my hands and let free my thoughts,
My memories are on fire-good-let them burn,
May the horror house begin to rot,
Now its my turn,
I look in the mirror and your brown eyes pierce my mind,
Of course I fell victim... I am your kind,
I have dreams of your face as I peer into the mirror,
I laugh and look around because its your laugh that I hear,
I look at my golden skin and think of yours,
I have missed saying that I love you....
You have caused me many tears and have replenished my fears,
But your memory I will forever hold dear,
I miss holding your rough hand and shaving my pretend beard,
I miss your grimy shirts and calling you a grease ball,
I miss you.
My brown eyes reflect a vivid picture of yours...
When it rains it pours,
I remember when you'd get drunk,
The secret stash hidden in the trunk,
You thought I didn't know...how could I not?
In your memories I am forever caught,
In you web I am your forever prey...
You are gone...but you are here day by day,
The house was empty...momma was crying "Please don't hit me",
All those screams still  haunt my dreams.

Yup... Im that girl...

I am the girl that sings in the shower.
I am the silly girl that races with the time on the microwave...multitasking,
I am the blunt girl that tells you what I think-even when you weren't asking,
I am that girl.....
I believe in "Happy Ever Afters",
I believe in laughter,
I am that girl nobody understands...
I am that girl that has the world in her hands,
I am that girl...
I am that girl who believes in second chances,
I believe that accidents happen,
I am that girl who dances in the rain and prances through the hot fields of daisy's,
I am loved and just maybe....
I am not meant to change,
I am beautiful and free...
I am that girl that confesses I am no perfect... but only whom I wish to be...